October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. This is a cause that is near and dear to us at Still Waters Therapy. Every year, we host a yoga event to raise awareness and donate to Laurel House, an organization that does incredible work supporting survivors of domestic violence.
Through our work in child welfare and with individual clients, we know that domestic violence is happening everywhere, all the time. And while we often talk about the survivor, the impact reaches so much further. It affects the children who witness it, the family members who worry, the friends who may not know what to say or do, and the people who love someone who is living in an unsafe situation. The fear, the uncertainty, the helplessness and even the hopelessness can become pervasive and one of the things we wish more people understood is that domestic violence isn’t always easy to recognize from the outside.
Sometimes there aren’t visible signs. Sometimes it looks like when someone is controlling who someone talks to, where they go, what they wear, how they spend money, or constantly making them question themselves. Sometimes it is isolation, intimidation, threats, manipulation or emotional abuse and sometimes the person experiencing it has become so accustomed to walking on eggshells that they aren’t even sure anymore what is “normal.”
If you are suffering at the hands of domestic violence, or if you love someone who is, you are not alone. The fear and the shame are real. But the shame does not belong to you.
If you love someone who is experiencing domestic violence, you may find yourself frustrated and wondering, why they don’t just leave. We understand that question but need you to know that leaving is rarely that simple. There can be fear for their own safety, fear for their children, financial dependence, isolation, threats, and so many other barriers that we may not see from the outside. And we also know that research shows that the most dangerous time for victims of domestic violence is when they leave.
Sometimes the most simple helpful thing we can do is simply stay connected. We need to listen without judgment, believe them and remind them that what is happening isn’t their fault. Let them know that you are there, even if they aren’t ready to leave today.
At Still Waters, we are honored to support Laurel House through our annual yoga event and to continue raising awareness about an issue that touches far too many families.
If You or Someone You Love Needs Help
Laurel House — Montgomery County’s Domestic Violence Resource
Laurel House provides confidential support, safety planning, counseling, emergency shelter, transitional housing, children’s services, legal advocacy and assistance with Protection From Abuse (PFA) orders.
24-Hour Confidential Hotline: 1-800-642-3150
24-Hour Text Line: Text HOPE to 85511
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. In Montgomery County, you can also text 911 if you are unable to safely make a phone call.
You do not have to be ready to leave a relationship to ask for help. You can call simply because you are unsure whether what you’re experiencing is abuse, because you are worried about someone you love, or because you need help understanding your options.
Laurel House: https://laurel-house.org/
